It's 9:47. Is it safe to turn the lights back on?

You see all kinds. Especially on Halloween.

We took the kids to Trunk-or-Treat at the church tonight. The kids had a great time, what with the costumes and candy and friends and grandparents.

Wife and I had a really nice time, too.

Here are a couple mysteries I wasn't able to solve tonight. Maybe you can help:

1. You're a mom. You're downtown. On Halloween. Walking down the street and through a parking lot. Do you wear shoes? Or just red socks?
2. We spotted a girl dressed as a French maid and one as a Pl*yb*y bunny. Both were under 16. Since when is that appropriate?

Like I said, you see all kinds. But that's one of the cool things about our Trunk-or-Treat - it's an event for our church members and the surrounding neighborhood. Our Children's Ministry Leader put the whole thing together with the help of a small army volunteers, and she did a great job.

If you're reading, Children's Ministry Leader, great job!

We left all the lights out at the house while we were gone so that the neighborhood kids wouldn't be disappointed by ringing our doorbell with no response.

I insisted that we leave them off even after returning, and we worked as stealthily as possible to get the kids in bed without offering any evidence of human life to anyone outside.

At 7:45, just after I finished Daughter's nighttime routine, the doorbell rang. Despite the fact that our house looks big and spooky on a regular night, much less with every light (including outside lights) turned off, some determined (or intoxicated) child still mustered up the resolve to come ring our doorbell.

I didn't go to the door, but I've got to give the kid credit for being goal-driven in the face of adversity.

Got any good stories to share from this Halloween?

The future's past is my present

My 2008 calendar was on my desk when I got to the office this morning.

Of course, the word "calendar" doesn't quite do it justice. How about this: My MeadWestvaco 2008 Week At-A-Glance Professional Appointment book was on my desk when I got to the office this morning.

And it was good.

In a world of Blackberries and Outlook calendars, I'm the crotchety old man who still uses an appointment book.

It's not that I have any objection to using the best available technology, it's just that the appointment book is the lazy man's diary. I can grab my book from a year gone by and see what I was up to back then.

For instance, on October 29 of 2002, I was babysitting phone technicians and furniture deliverymen as a former business partner and I went our separate ways. (It was a planned split, by the way. No business drama.) That evening, we met three other couples from our church for dinner at a local steak house.

On October 29 of 2004, I knocked off work a little early to meet Wife and some friends to cook dinner for the kids at a local children's ministry.

On October 29 last year, Wife and I were zipping around our little town calling on members of our church doing Stewardship Sunday stuff.

It's always exciting for me to get the new, unblemished appointment book because I know how much joy I'll get from pulling it off the shelf years from now and remembering these days.

Until I have a full-time, live-in biographer or a crowd of paparazzi following me around (I'd say the odds of either are better than 50-50), it's up to me to make the extra effort to keep up with the appointment book.

What about you? Do any of you still kick it old school like me and lug around a paper calendar?

Maybe they checked while I was out of town

Via Yahoo, I read tonight that Forbes has released its list of the laziest cities in America.

I was proud to learn that - despite my presence here - my city didn't make the list.

Answer to Movie Line Friday

This week's Movie Line Friday prize goes to wendydarling, who correctly answered that the line:

"Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines."

came from the movie Airplane. Nice work, Wendy.

The morning after I posted that line, I chuckled to myself as I remembered more and more lines from that movie. It's a classic.

Tune in next week for more Movie Line Friday!

I learned the best lessons before I even got to the classroom

We said goodbye to Everette last night.

He didn't die or anything. He's just retiring.

Everette is the security guard at the building where my MBA classes meet. He's retiring from campus security to spend more time with his family and attend to some medical issues.

Although his college education was paid for by the GI Bill, Everette dropped out after one semester because he had a small child at home. He worked a number of jobs until later in life, when he starting working as a security guard.

After seeing Everette each week for the last year or so, I'm convinced that no one should be allowed to graduate from our program without taking a class from him. Here's what the syllabus would look like:

Week One: Giving Compliments

From the moment I opened my car door to the moment I walked into the classroom each week, Everette dished out compliments. He loved the old Jeep Grand Cherokee I used to drive, and he has raved about my Accord. He has told me at least three times a week that I'm a sharp dresser and that he knows I'm a good student.

When he finishes with me, he transfers his praise parade to the next person. It's a very nice thing to watch.

Week Two: Beverage Preparation

When I get to class, there are always two pots of fresh coffee in the break room. A decaf pot and a regular pot. Everette makes sure to remind me to get a cup of coffee. In between breaks, he makes fresh coffee for us.

Coffee prep is not in Everette's job description, but he gets a kick out of making sure we have fresh beverages to keep up awake into the later hours.

Week Three: Random Acts of Kindness

Everette kept a nice tray of candy on the reception desk. During breaks, I'd go pick through the candy and chat with him for a minute. I would round up a handful of gummy fruit slices and head back to class.

One week last fall, Everette handed me a bag of gummy fruit slices and said, "Here you go. I know you like these, so I got you some at the store."

I was humbled, to say the least.

I think everyone needs to learn that kind of stuff because we're missing a lot of that in our culture. We need more of that selfless agape love - putting others before yourself with no expectation of anything in return. That's the missing piece.

Last night, we returned the favor for Everette and did what you're supposed to do to show love and appreciation in the South - we ate with him. Subway sandwich tray, Chick-Fil-A nugget tray, chips and queso from Salsarita's and a big chocolate cake.

And I drank a big cup of black coffee with my sandwich, chicken and chips. Because I know that next week - when I make the stuff myself - it just won't taste the same.

Movie Line Friday

Time for another edition of Movie Line Friday. This one should be pretty easy:

"Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines."

Fake profits teach real lessons

I haven’t yet decided what I’m going to do with my share of the $9.5 million.

I may pay off the Honda. Maybe get something nice for the wife. Set aside a portion for a rainy day. We’ll just have to see.

Of course, it would help if this were real money we’re talking about. Unfortunately, it’s not. I’m daydreaming about how to spend my share of the profits from a computer simulation called The Marketing Game, which was an assignment for the Strategic Marketing Management course I recently completed.

In The Marketing Game, teams of students design competing products and introduce them to a simulated marketplace. Each team makes decisions about every aspect of their product, from technical specs to wholesale price to promotion. The computer feeds back results detailing market share, brand awareness and profit.

A more boastful man would tell you that the $9.5 million profit my team raked in over six hypothetical years was at least double that of our nearest competitor. But I don’t want to sound like a sore winner, so forget I even mentioned it.

While the profits aren’t real, the lessons learned from The Marketing Game will stay with me for many years to come. Here’s what I learned:

Know Your Customer – That’s a worn-out phrase in the business world, but it got that way for a reason. It’s absolutely crucial to understand who buys your product and why.

We designed our product with features that would appeal to a specific segment of the market. We omitted features that would confuse or overload our target market. By knowing what attributes our customers desired in a product, we grabbed a disproportionately high share of the market and held it throughout the game.

Do older drivers favor big American sedans because of the comfortable seating and easy ride? Or do big American sedans have comfortable seating and easy rides because that’s what older drivers prefer? I’d say it’s a healthy amount of both.

Sell Where Your Customers Will Buy - Based on what we knew about our target market’s habits, we offered our product for sale in places we felt confident they would buy. We pushed a token amount of product out through a secondary channel for test purposes.

If you make a mean quiche, you probably shouldn’t try to sell it at Hooters. If you remodel old homes, you probably don’t need to hand out a ton of business cards in your town’s newest subdivision.

Invest in Your Brand – We pumped a big portion of our budget into brand-building activities like advertising and promotion. As a result, we enjoyed high levels of brand awareness. Initially, we relied on our brand to add credibility to our product. In the later stages, we eased off our advertising spending because a feedback loop had developed. Our brand enhanced the product, and the product enhanced the brand.

Apple does such a great job caring for its brand that I couldn’t wait to get my hands on an iPod a few years back. And because I’ve had such a good experience with my iPod, I didn’t hesitate to buy a Mac when my PC died a few months ago. Once again, the brand fed and product and the product fed the brand.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to make a quick phone call to my travel agent. I need to see if she’ll accept Marketing Game profits as payment for the Mediterranean cruise I booked.

When our families say, "Thank heavens THAT'S over!"

Thus concludes the three week span in which everyone in our house has a birthday.

Whew.

Four birthdays in three weeks is a lot of celebrating. And a lot of cake and ice cream. And presents.

I'm expecting the Chamber of Commerce to send us a "Thank You" card any time now for stimulating our town's retail businesses so robustly each October.

I haven't been around MBI much lately, but here's what I've been up to:

• Finishing up my Accounting class. I needed a 40 on the final to get the grade I wanted in the class. I got an 87, which is a silly score for me in something that involves numbers and multiplication and all that. I was very pleased.
• Riding the highs and lows of son's entry into our state's early intervention program for his speech delay. Your comments on my post were very encouraging. I feel much, much better.
• Pulling zinnias. Daughter and Nana planted a huge garden of zinnias here back in the spring. The flowers were absolutely gorgeous. But they were starting to die and had to come out before the leaves fall. I must have pulled 1,000 zinnias out of the ground last weekend.
• Wearing new night guard on my bottom teeth. Apparently the new way I'm working out stress is by clenching my jaw and grinding my teeth at night, which leaves me with blinding headaches during the day. Now I clench down on a custom-fitted piece of silicon (or something clear and rubbery) and wake up with a less intense headache. So I guess it's working.
• Meeting with clients. Driving. Doing paperwork. FedExing stuff. Driving. Getting new clients.
  
• Pulling together songs for a CD for Wife for our anniversary. Because if we haven't had enough hoopla in past three weeks, our anniversary is just a couple weeks away.
• Trying to make sense of the Southeastern Conference.

That's just a sampling. Have a great weekend.

Daughter

My little girl was a silly toddler.

If we left her alone for even a split second, she'd find something fun to climb into. In this photo, taken when she was about a year old, it's one of her toy baskets. Another time, we found her sitting on a big pile of grapefruit in a box in the kitchen.

Now that she's a preschooler, some things have changed. Her hair is longer and her cheeks aren't as chubby. She prefers coloring and writing over climbing into random stuff around our house.

But even though her appearance and activities have changed, the little girl inside hasn't. She's still curious. And cautious. And eager to please.

And she still has those beautiful blue eyes, and a dimple on her face that we only get to she when she's either really happy or really mad.

Today, my little girl - the precious creation who made me a Daddy - turns four.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

This blog has been hijacked...

Hello!

Wife here. I'm hijacking my hubby's blog to tell you that today is his 31st birthday! So leave him a happy birthday wish, please!

I made him a list of all of his wonderful qualities over at Runaway Mommy just like he did for me here on my birthday (I know, I'm terribly original). So stop by and see why he's the best!

I love me some TV shows on DVD

My brother sent me the DVDs of the second season of 30 Rock.

Good stuff.

The thing I love about 30 Rock is that, like The Office, they pack so much funny into each episode that you have to watch each one a few times to catch all the lines.

Here's a great exchange I missed the first time:

Tracy Jordan: "So what's your religion, Liz Lemon?"

Liz Lemon: "I pretty much just do whatever Oprah tells me to."

Immediately preceding that exchange, they show Tracy's interview with a member of the Church of Practicology. He was turned away by the Practicologists for this rant:

Tracy Jordan: "I believe the moon doesn't exist! I believe that vampires are the world's greatest golfers, but their curse is that they'll never get to prove it! I believe there are 31 letters in the white alphabet!"

Funny, funny stuff.

There will come a day when we wonder what all the fuss was about

Last Monday a diagnostician from our state's Early Intervention program came to the house to check out our little Buddy Boo.

At Buddy's two-year checkup, the pediatrician referred him for an evaluation since he's still not talking. By age two, most kids have a pretty large vocabulary. Buddy does not.

In some cases, speech delays can be a clue that there's some larger issue lurking. In others, it simply means the kid just isn't ready to talk.

Our little man fits the bill for a late talker: he's a boy with a talkative older sibling. Still, we've had a feeling for a while that something just isn't right with his speech development.

The diagnostician administered the DAYC test, which can be used to assess little ones in the areas of cognitive ability, communication, personal/social skills, physical skills, and adaptive behaviors.

For the most part, Buddy nailed the exercises. But his lack of speech was apparent.

Later in the day, the diagnostician called back with the results from the DAYC. Based on the little guy's scores, he qualifies for free speech therapy through the state's Early Intervention program.

It was good news and bad news at the same time.

No parent sits and dreams of the day their child gets diagnosed with a speech delay. But at the same time, knowing that my fellow taxpayers will be footing the bill for Buddy's therapy was a bright spot in an otherwise cloudy day.

Thank you, fellow taxpayers.

Today, two nice ladies from the Early Intervention program came by to talk with us and set goals for Buddy's therapy. Later this afternoon, the speech pathologist's office called.

Things are in motion. Daddy feels better.

We're getting ready for a wiggly good time

I'm almost afraid to share this with you because I'm afraid it might unleash a tidal wave of envy.

But here goes:

We have tickets to see The Wiggles.

Live. In person.

Anthony. Murray. Jeff. Sam (aka Fake Greg). Captain Feathersword. Dorothy the Dinosuar. Henry the Octopus. THE WHOLE GANG.

Now all I need to do is find some sort of helmet contraption to put on each of my kids, because it's almost certain that their heads will explode when we enter the arena.

And if I've learned one thing on this crazy journey called parenthood, it's that nothing ruins a day out like an exploded kid head.

I like that she's ambitious

Looks like it's going to be a busy day around the MBI Estate. Daughter just dictated her To Do List to me.

Here's what she has on tap today:

1. Clean the kitchen
2. Clean the table
3. Dust everything off
4. Put out fires
5. Make an extra-special bouquet
6. Watch something
7. Go to the beach
8. Go out to dinner
9. Go to the big party
10. Draw a picture of a firetruck
11. Make snacks
12. Spray bug spray so mosquitoes don't get us
13. Spray everything in the kitchen to make it smell good
14. Make the cups all sparkly
15. Light the candles and make it glow
16. Make flowers smell good

Frankly, I'm not sure we can knock this all out in one day. But I suppose there's only one way to find out...

Answer to quiz questions

I know you've been on the edge of your seats to get some background on the questions I asked you earlier this week. Here's your closure.

This guy gave a presentation on behavioral finance at a conference I attended this week. Behavioral finance is an emerging discipline that is sort of a cross between finance and psychology.

The point of the two questions I asked you were this: Studies have shown that people become conservative when faced with gains and aggressive when faced with loss.

So in the first scenario, where you can take a guaranteed 50% return on what you have or flip the coin for either a 100% return or zero, the average person would take the 50% return and be on their way.

In the second scenario, where you can either walk away or flip the coin to earn your money back, the typical person will get aggressive and flip the coin to try to get back to their starting point.

Your answers were all over the map, and I like that. No one has ever accused you of being average or typical. As a general rule, most people elect not to flip the coin in the first case, and nearly all elect to flip it in the second.

Fascinating stuff, eh?

Answer to Movie Line Friday

This week's Movie Line was a little bit tougher than in previous weeks, and it's a pretty obscure line.

The answer is: Spies Like Us.

Chevy Chase plays a State Department bureaucrat and speaks at a press conference in one scene. When he gets tired of answering questions, he starts acting like his microphone isn't working. At the very end of his little trick, you he looks at his watch and says:

"unch date. So I must go."

It's one funny portion of an all-around very funny movie. If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it.

Tune in next week for another edition of Movie Line Friday!

Movie Line Friday

Alright, folks. You've waited all week for it, so here it is: MOVIE LINE FRIDAY!!!

This week I'm bumping up the challenge a little bit. This line is more obscure than the last few, but I fully expect someone to know it.

You hear that? I believe in you people. You can do eeet.

Here it is:

"unch date. So I must go."

Another quiz question

Good job with your responses to the first quiz question.

The second question is similar to the first, but slightly different. Once again, tell me what you would do:

You are in a casino and began the night with $1,500. You've been even or ahead most of the night, but you took a bad hit on your last wager. You're now left with $1,000. You're given the opportunity to flip a coin. Heads, you win $1,000. Tails, you lose the $1,000 that you have. What do you do?

Once I've got your responses this question, I'll give the explanation behind this one and the last one. Then we'll do a few more.

A quiz for you

I took an interesting quiz at a conference I attended earlier this week.

Over the course of a few posts, I'm going to be asking you a few of the questions to see how you answer. Here's the first one:

You have just been given $1,000. You are then given the choice between receiving an additional $500 guaranteed or flipping a coin for a chance at an additional $1,000.

What would you do?

Happy Birthday to the Wife

Thirty-one things I love about my Wife:

1. She loves coffee


2. She laughs at most of my jokes


3. She's a rule follower


4. She has a sweet southern accent


5. She's tall


6. She has gorgeous blue eyes


7. She washes and folds my clothes


8. She has a ridiculous sense of humor


9. She talks with her hands


10. She loves my family


11. She's a fantastic-looking pregnant woman (note: she is not currently pregnant)


12. She can cook


13. She makes life very special for our kids


14. She lets me think I'm the head of our household


15. She can sing


16. She loves structure and routine


17. She's a cute dresser


18. She watches Will Ferrell movies with me - and laughs


19. She looks hot in her minivan


20. She coordinates our monthly budgets


21. She plays Wii with me


22. She makes our bed every day


23. She takes our daughter to ballet and our son to kindermusik


24. She laughs at my blog posts


25. She reads a ton of books


26. She has a master's degree


27. She puts other people at ease


28. She prays for - and with - our children


29. She gave her blue eyes to both of our kids


30. She makes me glad to come home at the end of the day


31. She's been my friend for 13 years and my wife for 7

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WIFE!

You win some, you lose some

Some days things just don't go your way.

Here are a few signs that today might not be your day:

1. Your alarm clock doesn't ring, so you show up to work late
2. It starts pouring rain and you don't have an umbrella
3. A judge decides that Kevin Federline is a better parent than you

Help me with a blogging project

I was looking over my blog template here trying to come up with some ideas to jazz it up.

I thought about adding a sidebar containing some of the nice links I've received over the course of my blogging career. And I may still do that, but to me it would be just as much fun to put some fake praise over there.

Have you ever seen the e-mail forward that has a list of hollow, non-committal employment references? Things like, "I can't think of enough good things to say about so-and-so"? Let's do that.

I'll get you started, then you jump in with your contributions in the comments. I'll pick a few of my favorits and put them in the sidebar, assuming I can figure out how to put stuff in my sidebar. Here goes:

"Of all the blogs I have visited, My Best Investments is one of them."

"My Best Investments is as good as it can be."

"Any time I have doubts about my blog, I can read My Best Investments and feel better."

Okay, let's see what you've got.

Answer to Movie Line Friday

Congratulations to BooDaddy, who correctly answered that this line:

"I'm trying to use the phone!"

came from Pee Wee's Big Adventure. I haven't seen the movie in years, but some things just stick with you. That line is one of them.

Any time I'm using the phone and there's a lot of background noise, that line runs through my head.

I'm really going to turn things up a notch for this week's edition, so come back later in the week for Movie Line Friday!